People who don’t know a lot about grief think that by three years, a griever has “recovered”, finished grieving her soulmate, and is well on her way towards a “new” life. The surface can appear deceptive…Having completed my move out of the family home into a lovely over 55 complex only one block from our family home, I appear quite settled in my new apartment with its view of the Gibsons’ Harbour on the Pacific Ocean and the North Shore Mountains in the background.

I am developing a volunteer music singalong program at the local Assisted Living place in Upper Gibsons, have re-started my blog and am planning two trips.

Before this I had ideas and made plans in my head, but could not put them into action. I now have motion, and also clarity, as my dear friend Urszula notes.

However as the highs get higher, the accompanying lows are more painful. I delve deeper into myself and my life…seeking to process and release all the old wounds that have arisen as I engage my true path.

As I move further into my new life I am plagued with a kaleidescope of strong emotions…going “up and down like a toilet seat” as my funny mother used to say…different from one day to the next…even one hour to the next.

In moments when I feel that I’ll be stuck in this never ending grieving loop forever, I remind myself to engage with spirit…to remember what my guides have told me “We have a plan for you…This move is just the beginning…”

It is a setup for my future.

Love & Light

Ellen

Copyright 2023 Ellen Besso

Ellen Besso is a retired Life Coach, Counsellor & an energy worker. She is the author of An Indian Sojourn: One woman’s spiritual experience of travel & volunteering, and Surviving Eldercare: Where their needs end & yours begin, both available through Amazon. Ellen is currently working on a book about her partner’s illnesses, his transition & the myriad forms of contact they have had since Don left this planet.