This two month trip to Melaque Mexico was guided. I felt compelled to go there, to the place Don and I had visited so long ago in 2001. I did not know why I was going, just that I needed to.

I was nervous about the trip for several weeks before leaving, sensing something important was about to happen. My intuition was correct; the sojourn there was remarkable, more uplifting than I had ever imagined.

Beginning the first evening at Tito’s Restaurant on the beach in West Melaque, the magic never stopped. I wrote about my uplifting portal experience that night in a blog called Don Softly Returns and will write more about the depth of it soon. The experience nudged me into singing open mic inside Tito’s the next afternoon, something I had not done before.

My singing over the next two months, the many new friendships and the first night’s profound experience all made my time in Melaque a rich spiritual experience. The town is a special place where many folks return year after year. I sense the energy draws them, perhaps on an unconscious level. The West beach area is particularly uplifting, but the entire town seems to have maintained the mellow vibe we noticed on our first visit 24 years ago.

I needed to travel by myself, that was key to the spiritual shift that happened. Solo travel, while providing a certain freedom, is not for everyone. It takes a certain type of person, a particular personality if you will, to travel alone. I know other women who do this, they are in relationships and also travel alone.

“Loneliness is part of travelling alone” says a well travelled neighbour. Although I was encompassed by the soft, healing energy of the West Melaque Beach and enjoyed time with numerous new friends and acquaintances, I was at all times conscious that I was alone in a deeper sense. Thirty years of travelling as a family and later in a couple had not prepared me for this.

I have travelled alone before for shorter times. Last February’s trip to Bucerias Mexico was not meant to be a solo trip, however my friend had to cancel about ten days before the leaving date. That trip worked out quite well as my small, five unit casita was populated by friendly folks and I met a couple of other women in cafes. In Toronto, although alone, I have friends and relatives to visit with.

I learned a lot about myself and about others during this time alone. It took me a while, but finally I understood that in order to connect with others some commonalities may be needed. The small group that returned annually to the hotel were close friends over many years, some knew each other from 20 years in Vancouver. They were like a club, friendly enough, however I was the outsider, and the only single woman amongst men and couples during the first month of my stay. The multiple daily communal visits, involving for the most part male driven conversation, were not what I wanted I realized after trying to fit in for awhile.

I found my tribe through music, both with other musicians and the audience of family and friends, and with women with shared experience and interests. My friend from Texas, a holistic and spiritual woman, was a new widow, staying in a hotel near mine. A common art interest was shared with another new friend from the collage course at Centro de Arte y Cultura in the town centre.

At this point I am not planning to take such a lengthy trip by myself, although it’s hard to say, as plans seem to change rapidly these days.