I have been physically separated from my soulmate for close to four years. From the time Don “died” I knew that the more I was able to let go of him and our earthly life together, the deeper our connection would be on a spiritual level. This profound realization has been a challenge beyond words for me.

With Don not being forthcoming, typical of many men, I once likened him to the Runaway Bunny in the children’s book by Margaret Wise Brown, telling him, “You’re my bunny, I’m not going to give up on you”. And I didn’t…ever.

When he received his first scary diagnosis, the Alzheimers one, one of the first thoughts that passed through my mind was “We should renew our vows”. I forgot about that in the chaos of adapting to a new life, following a program of diet, brain stimulation and exercise, one that occupied much of our days. But that thought showed the deep commitment I felt for Don.

Now in June of 2024, almost four years after Don left us, I am making progress amidst my ongoing grief. I have begun Sahaja Yoga chakra balancing work, to shift my kundalini awakening energy and ease my emotional pain, enabling me to move forward less encumbered by the past.

In our first session my lovely guide told me gently that I was holding Don back from flying in my yearning to be closer to him. “He will always be with you”, she said. I have sensed all along that I have been clinging too tightly. Clinging is not at all the same as the deep and rare soul connection between Don and myself referred to by Sharon and the Grandmothers of the Net of Light during a session in the spring of 2021. My teacher’s gentle words and the chakra exercise we did together helped me to loosen my grasp.

Three days later, lying on Urszula’s acupuncture table with needles in, Don showed me an image of a bird sitting on a hand, flying away, later to return out of love. Since then, whenever I think of it, I hold out my open hand in a symbolic gesture of releasing Don.

After the chakra session I received the additional awareness that by letting Don fly I am enabling myself to also fly on my new path.

This morning, while doing directed writing in my journal, Don told me to “loosen, not cut” our connection. I went down to the harbour and after many shots managed to capture a picture of a seagull floating free high above my head.

Love & Light

Ellen

Copyright 2024 Ellen Besso

Ellen Besso is a retired Life Coach, Counsellor & an energy worker. She is the author of An Indian Sojourn: One woman’s spiritual experience of travel & volunteering, and Surviving Eldercare: Where their needs end & yours begin, both available through Amazon. Ellen is currently working on a book about her partner’s illnesses, his transition to spirit, & the many forms of contact they have had since Don left this planet.