Ellen Besso Coaching

“Turning and turning in the widening gyre
The falcon cannot hear the falconer;
Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold…” – William Butler Yeats, The Second Coming

There’s no question that we’re living in challenging times. To many of us, it feels like everything’s changing; our old way of doing things isn’t working well for us now. The centre is no longer holding.

It’s become the norm these days to live flat out, to schedule even our downtime with social, community and self development activities. We hear and read about simplifying, cutting back, doing less and so on constantly. In our fast paced society, it’s helpful and necessary to be reminded to slow down.

What I’m wondering today is, how many of us can remember a time when our lives were different…when they weren’t overloaded…  when there wasn’t this relentless pressure to do more of everything.

Lately I’ve been grieving because of my friend and her daughter’s illnesses. But I didn’t recognize that inside the sadness there was anxiety until just recently. Two things happened that helped me see this. Firstly my friend in North Van sent me yet another e-mail saying I’d inadvertently sent her an e-mail meant for another woman of the same name; she told me I was clearly doing my e-mails too quickly and to “slow down and smell the coffee.” Secondly I’ve noticed that my mind is often racing… from one task to another or moving so quickly I can’t concentrate on reading something as simple as a mystery novel. I’ve been getting lots done, but at what cost?

Returning to my dance-exercise class after 8 months’ absence due to knee injuries has helped me “clear the dust” so to speak. Even though the releasing of energy from the classes stirred me up so that my sleep was disturbed some nights, now, after 2 weeks I can feel myself  slowing down and moving into a different space. It’s a place where I can actually observe myself and my actions and behaviors.

What a concept, to be able to become aware of ourselves! The trick is to slow down enough, just enough to allow ourselves tiny little pauses. Then we hear our inner voice – that voice that’s seldom wrong about anything.

Here are some questions and ideas to help you connect with your own internal voice:

• Firstly, breath in deeply, hold the breath then let it out. (You can do this 1-5 times)

Now consider the following:

• Does this thing I feel I have to do really matter?

• How do I feel doing it?

• What will happen if I don’t do it, or do it later?

• What 3 things in my life give me the most joy?

• How can I do more of them?

• Who are the people who uplift me?

• How can I spend more time with them?

• Carry a young picture of yourself with you and communicate with her daily

• Take a short break between activities to refresh yourself & change your energy

Remember, less is more!